Honoring Other Living Creatures is Not the Problem

By Bernie Siegel, M.D.

The reason I say that honoring other living creatures is not the problem is because not honoring ourselves is the problem. And if we do not honor ourselves, we cannot honor others. Remember the message, ‘Love thy neighbor as thyself’? If there is no self-love, no neighbor gets any either. We take better care of our pets then we do of ourselves and our families. Think of the self-destructive behavior of today related to our lifestyles. It is not out of ignorance but out of lack of inspiration and honor. Many centuries ago, Maimonides, the Jewish physician and philosopher, said, “If people took as good care of themselves as they do their animals, they would suffer fewer illnesses.”

So the first message is to honor yourself no matter what your parents, educators and clergy have told you about yourself that has led to feelings of guilt, shame and blame. Honoring yourself is not related to becoming what everyone else wants. It relates to living the life that you want for yourself. I believe when you choose your way of honoring and loving the world and all its creatures (animal, vegetable and mineral), you will honor yourself as well. This is not about getting what you want but of serving in your way. What creation is all about is honoring other living things through service.

Once you begin to honor yourself you will respect other living things as well. What Schweitzer referred to as, ‘A reverence for life.’ I saw an article in the paper a while back about not cutting down trees in the Pacific Northwest to save a species of owl. A college student wrote the paper saying we should cut down the trees because, “It’s only an owl.”

When you don’t honor all of life and begin to have categories that are all right to eliminate or kill you create holocausts. Look at the news today. We are killing each other because of races, religions, nationalities, sexes, skin colors and more. Animals are more respectful of life and make excellent role models. They do not destroy life on a whim or based upon differences, as we do. I think we should use them as role models and never do what Lassie wouldn’t do. You never hear a hotel owner who allows pets, complaining that a dog left a whiskey ring or cigarette burn on the furniture, took towels, or created excessive noise or a disturbance.

We need to respect each other. Employees at the Ritz Carlton Hotels receive a list of behavior instructions which starts with, ‘We are Ladies and Gentleman caring for Ladies and Gentlemen’ and ‘If someone has a problem it is your problem.’ Yet in experiments, where a person thinks he or she is inflicting severe pain with electric shocks on another person for wrong answers to questions, no one ever refused to push the button labeled “severe pain.” We torture and punish each other and have trouble honoring and being compassionate towards one another. As a young man who died of AIDS said, “What is evil is not the disease. On an individual basis many beautiful things will be created because of it, but what is evil is to not respond with compassion to the person with the disease.”

I only know of one young man who had the courage to honor and love in the face of abuse and more. When he was considering suicide because of what his parents did to him I asked, “Why don’t you get a gun and kill your parents and not yourself?” What would you say to that? Most would agree it is a good idea. Tony said, “No, I don’t want to be like them.” He wrote of his experience in his book, A Rock and A Hard Place.

He chose love and it saved many lives including his. As Joseph Campbell said, “The world’s a mess. It will always be a mess. Our job is to straighten out our own lives.” That begins when we honor ourselves and our beauty and accept our imperfections and rehearse becoming a person who honors and respects life.

Remember to keep your baby pictures with you at all times. It will help you to be kind and honor yourself and people will find it hard to not honor you after asking, “What a cute kid. Who is it?” When you say, “It’s me,” watch their expression change.

In closing, remember honoring is not about liking everything someone does but it is about honoring them and being willing to relate, dialog and heal. Criticism is a part of honoring because it shows you care and polishes the mirror of those who honor themselves and you when they are capable of listening and learning.

Dr. Bernie Siegel is a well-known proponent of alternative approaches to healing. Since his retirement from general and pediatric surgical practice in 1989, he has dedicated himself to humanizing the medical establishment’s approach to patients and empowering individuals to play a greater role in the healing process. He is the author of several books, including Love, Medicine and Miracles; Peace, Love and Healing; and his newest, 365 Prescriptions for the Soul: Daily Words for Healing Mind, Body, and Spirit.